For nearly 20 years, Carrboro resident Sharon Sherman has suffered from some disease that you've never heard of. You can't tell by looking at her, but apparently she and a couple other thousand have to live with this weird disorder every day; in fact some percent of people will experience it at least once in their lifetime.
And now she wants you to notice.
Apparently she's pissed off that no one's ever paid attention to her horrific illness, so now she's making ribbons. She's making ribbons and she's going to go out and give them to everyone in town just so they'll know the name of the disease that she and some number of other people in the world suffer from--for millions of people would be saved every year if people were just more aware of their illness.
Sarah Spanky, a stuck-up girl with a rich daddy, weighed in. "Don't we already know enough diseases? Not even just the big ones either; we've got tons of those little insignificant diseases wedged into our memories too, because I'm sure that helps them get the medical attention they need. Do they get sicker if we don't wear the ribbons?"
"As a matter of fact, yes," says Dr. Hans Jorgenson of the Center for Disease Control. "In a statistical analysis there was a strong inverse relationship between ribbons worn for a specific disease and people killed by it."
People like Spanky are still skeptical. "Sherman isn't even telling people what the allegedly horrific disease does that's so horrifying. Even if it's one of the interesting diseases that puts water in your brain or makes your face look like a bird or Benjamin Button, people don't know because she 'doesn't feel comfortable talking about it.' In that case, why did she decide to make ribbons and raise awareness in the first place?"
Spanky added, "Just another fucking disease with another fucking ribbon. It makes me sick."
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